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Monday, June 13, 2011

ADHD kids and more freedom?

This summer we decided to give my son more freedom. The reasoning? He was going into 5th grade and we thought it was time to try it out. Now we wrestled with this question for awhile. Anyone with a child who has ADHD knows what we were going through. My son is a little more immature than the other kids when it comes to decision making. He does not think things through and has no thought to hmmm, maybe that is not such a good idea. I realize most kids are like that but it tends to be amplified in kids with ADHD. So we gave him a 1 mile radius (he knows the streets so he knew where the boundaries where) and when he roamed he was supposed to have my cell phone. The first couple days I could see where he was pushing his new found freedom but I waited. Then it happened. He went off with a younger friend. 30 minutes later the kids older sisters were at the door looking for them. Apparently the father was out looking for his son. I thought, no biggie. I'll just call my phone to see where they are at. 9 calls and 3 texts later my son comes sauntering home with a what's up? He had left my cell phone on the porch because he did not want it to get broken (or he did not want me to get hold of him) and the boys were off riding bikes. I was furious. Then I found out he had stretched the boundaries and had gone to places outside the limits I had set. So today he is grounded and cleaning his room. Tomorrow he gets to help me weed and the next he gets to help me clean the basement. Thank you Rhonda for the suggestions.:) My question, do I give him his freedom back? Do I try this again? Do I give explicit instructions this time so there are no loopholes about what my expectations are? I think I will. He is a boy and he will always push the boundaries and I cannot keep him home with me to protect him as much as I would like to try. I can however have clear punishments so he knows what will happen if he goes to far again. No one said parenting would be easy and boy were they right! But it is worth it. I love my kids with all my heart. I just hope they do not need too much therapy when they are older :)

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